What is the benefit of having an Irish passport?

  • (Appallingly phrased question, and, rather than appear to discriminate against a non-native English-speaker OR have me shaking my head in disbelief at the poor language skills/education standards of the question writer/their country of origin, I will assume her/her first language is not English and his/her head of state’s name sounds either like “slump” or “ping-ping”, AND I will assume that the overall gist of the question was to suggest a poor experience or impression of Ireland)(I omit the couple of dozen of the more accessible definitions of “good” on the basis that if his education to date survived without any interactions with a dictionary, thesaurus or other reference materials, then I’d really hate to be held responsible for damaging a clearly already fragile eco-system, by the introduction of facts (‘alternative’ or otherwise!)).

    Firstly, I’ve no intention of acting as a “defender of”, or “champion for” Ireland, because being Irish and having travelled to or lived in most of the world’s countries, I am more than familiar with how Ireland ranks in comparison to other countries…plus, like most Irish people, even though I tend to be very critical of my homeland, I am also able to recognise our positives and great advantages or successes. Ireland may be a world leader in such fields as pharmaceutical, IT, internet business/technology, food/agri-business, music, literature….and have some amazing and unspoilt scenery and environments and provide a genuine, safe and warm welcome for millions visitors which is the envy of the tourist sectors of many countries….and all of this despite NOT having an imitation castle surrounded by an imitation town or village (we have 100’s of REAL picturesque castles, towns and villages, as many of our ACTUAL visitors experience every year)

    The ‘tone’ of the question suggests a person who was disappointed not to find such a Disney resort or a long list of “biggest/smallest/longest/shortest’s-in-the world”….but then again the writer didn’t mention how many times he was shot as a result of Ireland’s Supreme Court’s inability to interpret their constitutional amendments to protect the lives of their citizens.

    The writer’s encounter with a lack of “good” (or “goodness”) probably suggests he was dealing with food-poisoning for which Ireland is (not) famous. Or perhaps, the places he ate insisted on serving real food and he went into “fries-with-everything withdrawal” or he was hospitalised with the shock to his digestive system (vegetables are virtually unknown these days in the diets of some of the US states, apparently).

    I did a little research with the Irish Tourist Board (Bórd Fáilte) and they surmised that may his lack of exposure to “good” means that his visit, unfortunately, did not coincide with the visit of the relics of Saint Therese which, although temporary, managed to raise the cumulative (daylight-adjusted) “goodness factor” of the entire island of Ireland (including western parts of Wales)(excluding County Cork, obviously, and the Blasket Islands (the “Star Wars” effect) to 12 on the 1–10 scale of goodness (the Tourist Board did send their apologies suggesting atheism or Judaism may have been a factor).

    Logical deduction suggests that the question writer didn’t take part in any educational programs or exchanges or English language camps, for which Ireland’s reputation is considered “very good” to “excellent”.

    So, without expressing any personal bias whatsoever, one can only conclude that either the writer didn’t actually visit Ireland and he, rather disingenuously, did a virtual/online tour he was conscious of being in Ireland because he had pretty good internet coverage and never took his eyes off the screen of his mobile phone.

    Of course, the deductions and evidence gleaned while attempting to provide a solution to the questioner’s problem (FYI Ireland has a terrible record of pre-emtively prescribing medications like Adderall, Ritalin etc etc to teenagers who refuse to “stop acting like teenagers and refuse to grow up” on schedule, preferring to interact and attempt communications as a primary option…positively medieval, I know!)…..together with the bizarre English (which I could be forgiven for, for assuming it was the output of a spoilt 12 year-old) AND the evident ignorance of the topic….well, if it is you, “Mr MAGA BIGLY”? Sure, I was just pulling your leg….(the one WITHOUT the ‘Vietnam bone spur’… I’d hate to ruin your near-perfect golf game!

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